Yesterday, I had the privilege of spending a few hours with one of my good friends, whom I actually already introduced you to in one of my first posts on this blog.
If you haven’t checked that out yet or don’t have a clue of what I’m talking about at all, my friend is actually a limousine driver that was present the day my life changed. You can check out his limo page here. Kane is quite the complex guy, and the best way I can describe him for now is through his website.
After the accident occurred, we became acquainted and had some great conversations despite what had just happened. Since that fateful day we have spent many other good times together and are constantly talking about the ways we want to help people and make the world a better place.
It was so nice to catch up with Kane yesterday and inform him of the many things I have been doing lately with traveling and speaking to inmates about my story.
When I get sad or really down on myself, I think of a certain set of train tracks we have here in Tennessee. It’s like my happy place, and what reminds me of how beautiful life can truly be. But why the train tracks you may be asking?
It just so happens that on the day I had my wakeup call on Tennessee Interstate 50, I happened to catch a glimpse of a railroad track nearby after the accident had already occurred. At the time I was already in an emotional state with a new sense of gratitude for still being alive. While experiencing those new feelings, I happened to see the train track which is now what I associate that rejuvenated feeling with.
How do you handle a negative past?
Depending on how negative a past you have been through, it can be difficult to rid yourself of the thoughts that dwell from it. Sometimes it seems like these thoughts will never go away, but the real truth is that the longer we allow them to stay in our minds they will.
As I mentioned in a previous post, thoughts are real things that you give life to every day. Where focus goes energy flows, so regardless your thoughts or positive or negative, that’s where the attention goes. This can be great for positive thinking but not so good for negative thoughts. The more you give life to your thoughts, the more realistic they will be and it will influence your words and actions. See how powerful these little buggers really can be?
My point is that in order to eliminate a negative past we have to learn to stop giving in to negative thoughts all together and replace them with positive ones.
We have most likely been carrying around these thoughts for several years, which is a lot of time for them to have taken on a functioning life of their own. It may seem like the past is “haunting” us in a sense, but we basically just have to move on.
I was doing some reflecting this morning as it was pouring down rain here in Tennessee. Watching out the window as the heavy raindrops fell and kissed the windows, my life began to play as a slideshow in the back of my eyes. I suddenly developed this overall sense of gratitude as I thought back to the day my life changed for the better.
If you haven’t read my post about my life changing on the TN Interstate 50, then I highly suggest doing so as I’m only going to go into brief detail here.
Anyways, I all of a sudden couldn’t believe that my life changed so much at such an unlikely location. I mean, I was on the interstate of all places!
Time. We all have it but just not the same amount. But for the time that we do have on this planet, we should treat it like a precious priceless diamond.
I used to waste so much time when I was younger, especially when I had to spend it in and out of prisons. Sure, it was my own fault and I take 100% responsibility for that.
Time has become a part of the life lessons I yearn to share with other people. Many people don’t realize how much time they are wasting by sitting around watching tv, playing games on the phone and computer, and all that other shit. Instead, they could be improving their own lives. I hear wayyy too many people complain about what they don’t have and why rich people have all the money in the world. Well guess what, it’s because they worked for it.
This seems to be getting slightly off topic, but the point I’m trying to make is that time is precious and we should treat it that way.
The title of this post may sound really stupid to some people but there has never been anything more true. Think about it for a second.
When you are in a positive and good mood it can seem as though everything is going great for you. Having a negative mindset makes it feel as though people are against you and maybe even that you are against yourself.
You see our thoughts are actually things that are made up of atoms and positively and negatively charged electrons, just as every other thing in life. When these electrons have a positive charge they will attract other positive electrons and vice versa. This is why it’s so important that we learn to take control of out thoughts and make sure there aren’t any negative ones floating around dominating the positive ones. This all may sound crazy as hell but it’s not, it’s reality. Look it up.
By now, you may know that I spent a large portion of my younger years in and out of prison, mostly here in Tennessee. If not, check out some of my other posts on this blog, or read my about page.
Now that decades have gone by and I have gotten a little older and wiser, I have dedicated my life to helping others (mostly teen boys) keep away from similar situations that I was in that took over my life for many many years. A big part of doing this is visiting juvenile centers to speak to those that are there for similar conduct, especially those that have been several times. These teens need someone to talk to that will listen to them and not judge who they are and define them by what they have done. This can only make the problem worse and them more angry.
I try to visit at least one center in the state of Tennessee once a week, whether it’s a familiar face or someone new. I have developed actual friendships with a few of the ones that were open to my visiting, and now I serve as someone they can trust and listen to. I have found these people to be very understanding of me as well, and I must say that it’s been nice have people to talk to that understand your past. I can’t say the same thing about my family.
Happy Memorial Day to everyone, and thanks so much to the men and women of our country that have served and protected all of the many, many years.
Today may be a day of honor, but it’s also used as another reason for Americans to eat and drink. That may sound a little harsh, but most don’t even realize what they are even celebrating. I am not here to rant but I feel a strong disrespect for our country when average people take advantage of everything in it, hardly ever acknowledging the real reasons we have our freedom in the first damn place.
I also feel strongly about drinking and driving though, and today is definitely a day that it will happen all over the country. I did a lot of drinking and driving when I was a lad and payed for it dearly. Like I have mentioned before, I spent a lot of time in and out of jail as a teen and into the first half of my adulthood. The point is that I could have avoided it all, but drinking was just a gateway that lead to worser things. It took control of my life and I went down such a bad spiral that I didn’t know if even wanted to live anymore.
Alcohol can do terrible things to you if it’s abused, and when you mix it with driving, things are taken to an entirely different level. I was actually caught for drinking and driving 3 separate times in my life and ended up losing my license for years. It was difficult to get a job and to keep one, and dating? Forget about it. Who wanted to date someone like me that couldn’t hold a job or drive.
My life really went like that because of my actions from where I was young and stupid. That’s why these days you will find me passing this story on to young people in attempt to keep them from making the same mistakes.
I know this doesn’t have a whole lot to do with Memorial Day, the whole point is that I just want people to stay safe on this day. Getting even one DUI can change your life and leave you feeling all kinds of ways that you really don’t want to feel.
For anyone that sees this, I hope you have a terrific holiday and stay safe. God Bless!
I just realized that I finished my awesome about page and didn’t include my name or any other personal details about myself. Kind of defeats the purpose of having an about page, don’t ya think? I even proceeded to write a post about why I started this blog and forgot to add my name in there as well, ha. So in this post I fully intended to let you in on who I am so you can maybe have a better understanding about why I started this blog. In the meantime, I suggest checking out my main post on why I started this blog to save both of us some time. So here we go…
Allow me to formally introduce myself. My name is Howard and I am a part-time truck driver living right smack dab in the middle of Kentucky and Tennessee. I started this blog because of life-changing experience I had while in prison. It was so life-changing and impacting that I felt like I owed the World my newfound knowledge as a way of giving back.
Since getting out of prison I have drastically turned my life around and it’s all thanks to that momentous experience on the 50. Hey, the name even inspired a great title for this blog, which just so happened to end up being available, which has led me to believe that I was even more so meant to share my endeavors through this blog.
I love life and consider it to be one of my biggest passions, aside from helping others and making the world a better place just one small step at a time.
My very first day on the 50 was working as a prisoner to pick up trash with about nine or ten other inmates. It was around 9am and the road was starting to clear up from all the morning rush hour traffic. The road was quiet for the most part while the sun was shining bright, and for a split second the day began to seem more beautiful than bad.
All of a sudden I was startled by a loud banging and crashing sound. It literally scared me so bad that I thought I had shit my pants. A horrible wreck had just taken place while my back was turned, and not even a football field’s distance from where I was working.
This limousine had blown a tire and the 18 wheeler that had been driving behind them had apparently been driving a little close and not paying much attention to what he was doing. The limo began to slow down a few seconds after the tire exploded and as the truck continued to draw closer, the truck driver failed to see the limo in time and ended up hitting the right side of the back bumper. Luckily, they both we’re going over 45 at the time and we’re able to come to a stop before any worse damage was done. It’s all still a little blurry to me because I didn’t see it with my own two eyes, yet heard it and sensed it’s closeness.